Once, Harry Potter and Ginny and Weasley arrived at the Weasley's house. When they got inside, Mrs. Weasley (or Molly) said, "Oh, Harry. Ginny, can you be a dear and go upstairs? We need to talk to Harry." "Um, okay," Ginny replied, and went upstairs. Molly asked Harry to take a seat at the table. Harry did. Molly said, "Oh, Harry, I can't believe you're going to be part of the family." Harry tried to say that he and Ginny were only dating, but Mr. Weasley (or Arthur) interrupted him, saying, "You listen here, boy: If you fuck my daughter, I will fuck you up." Harry said, "Mr. Weasley, Ginny and I aren't like that-" "Bullshit. Shut the hell up. I know how you teenagers are. So you just be warned: If you put your little wand inside my Ginny, that's the last spell your sorry ass is gonna cast." "Yes, sir." Fred spoke. "Oh, Harry, speaking of sex-" "Here are some Weasley-brand condums," George finished. He said that the condums make life feel enchanting. Arthur said, "You stupid bastards! SHUT THE HELL UP!" George said, "Alright, Dad, we won't give him the condums." Fred offered, "But we'll give you this for Ginny." Fred got out a wand that spun in circles. "Fred, come on," an annoyed Arthur said. Percy asked Harry what his plans were for the future, and Harry said, "Well, first I'm gonna kill Voldemort, and then-" "You idiot!" Percy said. "You don't have time for Voldemort. What if Ginny gets pregnant, then how are you going to take care of her.... and the baby?" "Well, luckily this piece of shit you call a home has like 20 stories, so I guess we'll be fine." Arthur said, "Fuck you, Potter! You're fucking my daughter, and now you insult my own home." Molly says, "Oh, Harry. We would love for you to move in. Have you already thought about baby names?" Ron said, "Screw you, Harry. I thought we were friends. Now I see how it's always been. You just befriended me so you could get your hands on my sister." Harry yelled, "LISTEN! ALL OF YOU! I'M NOT FUCKING GINNY!!" One of the Weasleys said, "Oh, but if there's one way or another, you will. Trust me. I dated a girl once, and she caught me making a porno out of her in a subway. We didn't have a condum back then, so it was kinda weird. I said no to her, and a week later, she caught me cheating on her with a fucking iguana." Harry said that he was sure it wasn't going to happen. The Weasley said, "You never know. Iguanas are sneaky bastards." George said, "And not to mention

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